9 months of Norah.

This little girl.  How can I possibly express what her life has brought?  Our days are filled with her precious smiles and cackles, "buh" and "duh" and "ma-ma-ma," and the joyful sounds of both daughters playing together (nicely, most of the time).  It brings so much more life to our home!  She points at everything, loves to tear apart toilet paper, does a happy dance at the sight of an avocado, already stands on her own without holding on and has taken one step, loves to try to lick shoes and the dog's bone, and sleeps in our bed, which I don't regret one bit. 

Yes, of course the days are exhausting and like every other mother, I feel tired and inadequate and desperate for time away.   But mostly, I find myself wanting to drink in every second of this little one's life, realizing that what everyone said is true: time passes much more quickly the second time around. 

I've never been so sick as when I was pregnant with her - so many days of begging God to take the sickness away while simultaneously pleading with him to keep my baby growing healthy and strong.   When I was that sick, barely able to take care of my older daughter most days, I had no idea who Norah was, if she was even a boy or girl.  For months, we were sure we were having a boy.  But this precious girl was preparing to come to us, to join our family.

Because of you, Norah Jewell, I feel more vulnerable than ever.  Another piece of my heart has been given away, and there's not a single thing I would change about that.  I'm truly reveling in the days of having another little one - these exhausting, difficult, beautiful, fleeting days. 

Kangaroo Care babywearing necklace.

A few years ago, I discovered Kangaroo Care on Etsy ~ the artist in Estonia makes beautiful, colorful babywearing necklaces from crochet beads and wood.  The textures and colors are interesting for babies and safe for them to play with and chew on while nursing or just being rocked and held.  Bonus: you get to directly support the work of an artist. 

This is my first Kangaroo Care necklace I got a few years ago when Luci Belle was a toddler.

I wore it when Norah was born, too.

That necklace made me happy, and I wore it for my babies until it was literally threadbare, faded, and the string finally snapped.   It was hard to let go of a piece of jewelry that was between me and my children during so many important moments.

It was time for a new one, but I just couldn't decide.  I don't do well with too many options, and all the colors were glorious!   These are the ones I was drawn to...

I finally decided on the bottom left.  It just jumped out to me.  For me, when in doubt, the answer is always bright color.  It goes with pretty much everything I own, and I - and the girls - couldn't be happier with it!

now for the exciting part...a giveaway!

I also ordered the bottom right necklace in the above photo - the white and grey beads with white ruffle!  I'd love to give this necklace away to one of you!

To enter, just post a comment and let me know who the necklace would be for and why - if you'll be giving it to a friend or keeping it for yourself, which is totally great too!   I'll randomly choose a winner from the comments on Tuesday, November 25th.

Sweet sisters.

I didn't have a sister growing up and always longed for one.  Now I get to witness the wonderful sisterhood developing between these two.  Surprisingly, to this day I have never heard Luci Belle say anything mean to or about her sister.  She's always happy to see her and to have her around.  I know it won't always be that way, but for now I'm soaking in all the sweet innocence that it is!

And all the mamas said, "Amen."

With all the "perfect" parenting days we get to experience, there are also those less than stellar ones where you find yourself driving around the neighborhood aimlessly, sipping hot tea and eating chocolate and praying your tired, cranky children fall asleep soon in their car seats.  You pray for sanity and grace and just a few moments to at least go to the bathroom by yourself.

Today was one of those.  Nothing really major was "off," it was just one of those days that started off with whiny-ness and bad attitudes and kept escalating.  It's even worse when we have no real plans for the day other than our morning school time.   I could feel my chest getting tighter and the frustration starting to build. 

Mid-morning, Norah slept for a hot 30 minutes and wanted nothing to do with napping after that, and her two top front teeth have just cut through so she's gnawing on everything in sight and wants to be held every waking minute, which I love doing, but sometimes you need a break.  When I was able to slip away by myself to the bathroom for a few minutes, I returned to see Norah inside an Amazon box on the dining room floor, chewing on a My Little Pony covered in Sharpie.   Luci Belle was trying to play an educational computer game that kept getting stuck and was repeatedly yelling my name.  Our dog was walking around nonchalantly with a Q-tip and a big ball of my hair in her mouth.  No kidding.

Around 12:30pm, I was running out of steam and attempted a universal nap time for all three of us, but was met with major 4-year-old resistance, "But I don't know HOW to take a nap," she whined.  Norah kept crawling on my face to pull herself up on the bedpost.

After that, I was barely holding it together.  My face was so contorted that Luci Belle actually asked me, "Why does your face look like that?" And I answered something lame about how she was being mean to me. She was quiet for a moment and then just came over and hugged me. Then I was able to look her in the eye, be the adult, and apologize for my terrible attitude.  We were able to talk calmly about how it feels when we're rude and disrespectful to each other.  I believe my children need to see that I'm not perfect, and they need to see me ask for forgiveness.  And Lord knows, they see it a lot around here.

So, time to get out of the house.

In lieu of nap time, we packed up the car and went to Urban Acres Farmstead to see Daddy and to get Mommy some adult interaction.

I finally ended up driving around the neighborhood drinking tea and eating chocolate hoping they would both fall asleep for much needed naps, and they did.  Looking like a deer in the headlights, I made it back to our house, parked in the driveway, and settled in to read for a few quiet moments.  Always have a book in your bag.  Trust me.

Exhaling, I sat in my driveway thinking about how much I need grace when I've been ugly and reluctant to serve my family on days like these.  I'm thankful for fresh starts, for small breaks to pause and recharge, and for one of the greatest truths I know - "His mercies are new every morning."

And all the mamas said, "Amen."