He will restore. (30 days of thankfulness - day 30)

I can think of no better note on which to end this month of thankfulness.  A few weeks ago in the middle of my Bible Study Fellowship lecture I was reminded of this verse:

“I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten..." (Joel 2:25)

I scrawled the verse on my notebook page, and underneath it in bold letters with my turquoise Papermate pen, I wrote, "HE WILL RESTORE."  Tears came into my eyes as I thought of our lives, the lives of so many close friends, filled with so much beauty and so much loss.  And so much hope.  God will restore.

Then, while taking a bath tonight, I read this passage in Anne Lamott's newest book, Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers...

I practically burst into tears right there in the bathtub.  My thankfulness posts are now all overlapping and intertwining, and I see how God weaves these beautiful stories.  I'd miss them if I didn't practice thankfulness, taking the time to write it down and see how it all connects.

My little family, we've lost much - more than is appropriate to share here in this public space.  But we will - and already have - receive back for what we've lost.  It might not be in the way we've pictured, but it will be good.  The details don't really matter, because what I want to communicate today to each and every person who reads this is that He will restore.  And that's the best possible news I can think of at this very moment. 

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

Real life. (30 days of thankfulness - days 25-29)

So, I got a little behind.  Lame, huh?  Days 25-29 of thankfulness are lumped together because life happens.  I thought I could catch up, but I thought I'd rather just be honest that I couldn't keep up with daily blogging.  Hats off to all who can - truly.  But I'll never be a mom blogger and I'm totally fine with that.

I'm thankful for this little blog seven years in the making, my creative space on the Internet where I get to share and ponder bits of my life.  But I'm even more thankful for my flesh-and-blood real life, the one that calls to me everyday with messes to clean and beautiful walks with friends and work to-dos and quiet unplugged evenings with my husband.

I've absolutely loved practicing thankfulness more intentionally this month.  Ironically though, the challenge to blog daily has shown me even more how less important blogging is than engaging in my real life. 

I do have a Day 30 for you, and it's a good one.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

My daddy. (30 days of thankfulness - day 24)

My daddy has championed my cause since day one, supporting and loving me.  I'm so thankful to have a father like him.  His life hasn't been easy - he's worked his fingers to the bone, with calloused hands to prove it.  He's lost both parents and both his siblings, one a few years ago, and one in a tragic car accident when she was only in her 20s.  He survived cancer.  He just keeps truckin' - a true fighter.

I have so many fun memories with my dad, but I especially love these photos...circa 1982 at Virginia Beach where we always vacationed as a family, where his strong hands would hold me in the water and keep me safe from the waves.  And then on my wedding day when he gave me away to the man I would marry...

This past August in New Jersey, I got to have time alone with just my daddy for the first time in a very long time.  I took him on a "date" to his favorite restaurant, Charlie Brown's, and then we took a drive through the country with the windows down.  I loved seeing his eyes twinkle, hearing his voice light up as he drove me through the countryside, reminiscing about his old haunts from childhood.

In a letter my daddy wrote to me my senior year in high school, he said,

"I knew from the day you were born that you will do something special with your life.  I want you to know that I love you very much and am proud to be your father.  Just keep doing what you're doing and you'll be fine."

And that pretty much sums up the way my dad loves me.  Always standing in the wings supporting me, cheering me on.  I'm blessed to be the daughter of a man like that.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

The mess. (30 days of thankfulness - day 23)

So we all have messy houses most of the time, right?  We don't need to prove that.  But I spent a lot of my life trying to be perfect, so I want to practice being thankful today for the mess.

The mess means I have people.  My people to take care of.  Energetic, joyful voices filling my home, defining my work and my mission.

The mess definitely means that life is not perfect.

Beauty is important, and my soul craves it.  It's essential to look for and notice beauty everyday. But here's the thing - even the mess can be beautiful.  You just have to change perspective and get past the fact that there's dried egg on your chin from sticky toddler hands and glitter all over the floor and paint smeared on a freshly cleaned shirt and an entire box of q-tips mysteriously scattered all over the bathroom.  Then you look into the eyes of your child or husband or yourself in the mirror and realize life is messy and that's what makes it precious.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

Thirty-five. (30 days of thankfulness - day 22)

On Thanksgiving Day, I celebrated thirty-five years on this earth.  How did that happen?  Wasn't I just turning 25, arriving home from dinner with friends in Nashville, and then stunned by a surprise party at our little abode in Hillsboro Village?  Back then, I was about 85 times tanner than I am now, with bushier eyebrows and a lot more makeup.  I guess I had more to prove then.  I certainly haven't "arrived" and keep discovering more about myself that I want to refine and change.  But there is something about the thirties that has helped me settle into more of who I really am.  And it gives me joy to realize that most of the people who were at that party are still close friends.

I love when my birthday falls on Thanksgiving, because I usually keep forgetting it's my birthday.  This introvert is perfectly fine with that; I'd rather be wrapped up in the wonderfulness of the holiday.  This year we got to spend Thanksgiving weekend with our dear friends Paul and Brooke in smalltown Athens, TX, about an hour from Dallas.  Over the course of this weekend, I was reminded again how much my soul craves smallness, how the love of a small town's simplicity and slower pace of life is deep in my bones.

The day was so memorable from beginning to end.  I was with my husband and daughter, my two best gifts.  It was a coolish breezy fall day, causing brilliant red, orange and yellow leaves to shower down on us the entire day.  A gorgeous table with mismatched chairs was set outdoors; about 20 of us held hands and gathered around for a prayer.  These were precious people who made us feel like part of the family. There were wild red wagon rides, moments in the wooden swing, chalk drawings, and some light drizzle to drive us inside to embrace the coziness.  And at the end, a double rainbow arched across the sky, God's little promise to me.

Another year of this perfectly imperfect life, and I couldn't be more thankful.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

Sleeeeep. (30 days of thankfulness - day 21)

A few months ago, at age 26 months, my daughter "slept through the night" for the first time.  In her life.  

It's not surprising that she's never been a great sleeper.  No matter how calm I try to keep our home the few hours before bedtime, her mind is always going, just like her daddy.  She seems to awake in mid-thought, or mid-pretending-to-be-a-monkey, or mid-exploring-with-Dora. 

When she was an infant, one of the most annoying questions people would ask is, "So...is she sleeping through the night yet?"  To a mom who had tried practically everything to help her baby sleep for longer than 45 minutes straight, it frankly made me want to punch them in the face.

But this post is supposed to be about thankfulness, so let's talk about how wonderful life is when you're getting solid sleep.  Happy times are here again.  The hills are alive with the sound of music.  Now that my body has experienced sleep again, it just wants more, more, MORE! It's not enough that she sleeps 8 hour straight now...I wanna go for 10, 11, 12!  But I won't be greedy.  I'll just be thankful for the vast improvements that have been made, for the rejuvenated mama looking back at me in the mirror - a mama who now has much more energy to pour into her vibrant, active little toddler throughout the day.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

Bible Study Fellowship. (30 days of thankfulness - day 20)

A vivid image from my childhood: my mom with her worn Bible open, her scrawling cursive filling up the blank spaces of her Bible Study Fellowship (BSF) lessons.  I must have been in grade school at the time, but it was obviously a memorable image - my mother intentionally seeking the Lord in a non-negotiable time of study that I recognized as special and sacred.

Bible Study Fellowship is an international organization, so there are BSF chapters that meet at churches in 38 nations across the world.  The study year begins in September and ends in May, and during that time you study one book of the Bible - everyone around the world seeking the Lord and studying the same book at once.  Beautiful.

Earlier this year, my friend Melissa suggested that I join a local BSF class that was beginning this September - the designated book for this year was Genesis.  It's been so long - too long - since I've been in an organized, disciplined Bible study, and as much as I felt my soul craving it, I immediately started making excuses in my mind:

"Yeah, I already know Genesis.  Adam & Eve, Noah's Ark, Abraham."

"How could Genesis possibly be relevant to my everyday life in 2012?"

"I don't really have time for this." 

"Would Luci Belle be okay in the children's class separated from me for a few hours?"

But I took the plunge, and I can't possibly state more strongly how much it is changing me and how much my daughter is learning.  On a typical BSF day (Wednesday mornings), I drop Luci Belle at her class, where she eagerly runs to her teachers without a single tear.  Then I head to the church sanctuary where hundreds of women gather for a few songs before we split up to our small groups.  During small group time, we discuss the previous week's study notes and our answers to the questions.  After small group, we reconvene in the sanctuary for the lecture, which my education-loving self thrives on - notebook open and ready, Bible open, colored pens uncapped. Only through the Holy Spirit could a straightforward, very un-exciting lecture move a person to tears - which it has already done for me multiple times.

The BSF children's classes are not just childcare.  These teachers love the children deeply, pray for them individually, and teach them a pared-down version of the exact lesson we're learning that week.  My two-year-old is soaking it up like a sponge, asking me practically everyday if it's a "school day" and if she can go to "Bible school."  The second week of BSF, I inquired during the car ride home what she had learned that day.  She boldly declared, "Da Bible is twue."   Last week, we were getting ready to leave for BSF, and my husband picked her up and asked her if she was excited to go to Bible school.  She took her palm, placed it on his chest and said, "Jesus in heart, Daddy?"

I adore the ladies in my small group.  I didn't need another young moms group, but a group of women from diverse backgrounds and ages, and that is what I got.  Most women are older than me, and I love learning from their wisdom. 

More than anything, I'm pleasantly surprised how much Genesis is applicable to my daily life, how often I think about my BSF lessons all throughout my days.  I've found that the Word of God is absolutely "alive and active, sharper than any double-edged sword" (Hebrews 4:12).  The Scriptures have come alive to me once again, as I see the perfect picture of how the Word of God is a pursuant story, with cohesiveness from beginning to end.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.

"Me" time. (30 days of thankfulness - day 19)

Sometimes you just need a steaming cup 'o tea, a good book, and some quiet.  For mamas of toddlers, this is ideally multiple times a day - haha - but ideally at least once.   I wish I was disciplined enough to wake up at 6:30am every morning, but "me" time usually happens later in the evening for this night owl, after my daughter has gone to sleep.

On this particular evening, it included Bedtime Tea, my bookmark from Little Shop of Stories in Decatur, GA, and Anne of Green Gables. On page 29 I read, "Isn't it splendid there are so many things to like in this world?", and I knew Anne and I were kindred spirits.

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During the month of November, I'm practicing "30 days of thankfulness" - will you join me?  Use your blog, Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram to voice your thankfulness for something every day in November.  My hope is that this daily routine will create in me a heart of thankfulness and gratitude, no matter the day or month or situation.