I'm a packrat.

Ugh.  As I've been working through Project Simplify and the book Organized Simplicity the last few weeks, I've realized something about myself that's painful to admit:

I'm a packrat.

I might not be this bad, but it's close, especially when it comes to keeping letters, notes, bits of paper, and other sentimental memorabilia.

Let me illustrate.  In the process of attacking the beast that is our guest room closet, I found a smooth wooden box that I made in 7th grade shop class.  And here's a list of some of the "treasures" I found inside...

• A letter I wrote to my "future husband" in 1994.
• An entire key ring full of soda can tabs.  Why??
• Name badges from Centrifuge summer camp.
• My True Love Waits commitment card.
• An entire set of Lee Press-On Nails.  French manicure, of course.
• DCTalk after-show access pass.
• Several notes from my friend Beth, addressed to "Christine McIntyre," signed from "Beth Wahlberg." 
  
• My best friends' autographs.  Ya know, just in case one of them was famous someday.
  
• And the crown jewel of them all: a folded-up piece of notebook paper that has written on the front in pink pen, "New Kids' phone #s (that don't work)."  HAHAHA!

As you can see from the contents, I think it's pretty safe to say I had a very strong New Kids On The Block phase in middle school.

So, here's an actual conversation Steven and I had as I carefully sifted through the contents:

Me: Oh my goodness, you're not gonna believe what I just found.

Steven: What?

Me: All the New Kids On The Block's HOME ADDRESSES!  Do you think I should keep it?

Steven: Babe, seriously?

Me: (grinning sheepishly)  Ok, ok, I'll toss it. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he catches me trying to slip it back into the "keep" pile.

Steven: BABE!  Throw it away!

Me: OK, but what about THESE?  I saved all the pages from all my date books for the past 11 years.  This way, I can look through them and see what I did every single day!

Steven: WHY would you want to keep that?  Can't you just look through them now for 3 minutes to remember and then throw them away?

Me: Yeah, I guess so.  (start flipping through them, acting like I'm doing what he suggested)  UGH.  I'm sorry.  I just can't do it.  I can't get rid of them.

Steven rolls his eyes as I put them back in the "keep" pile.

See what I mean?  I need serious help.

That little wooden box was just ONE of the items I've been going through, but to my credit, I do have an entire garbage bag full of trash (the Lee Press-On Nails didn't make it) and another huge bag of papers to be recycled.  Various items have been added to the "give" and "sell" piles.  I've organized all the "stuff I really want to keep" into two small neatly-labeled plastic storage boxes.  

As my life is becoming more organized, I'm learning that I don't necessarily need a piece of paper to remind me of a special moment I already carry in my memory.  

And I guess I'll just have to give up on trying to get Joe McIntyre's mom on the phone for now.  Sigh.

The art of self-care.

hot tea on a rainy day, on a recent "me" dateThis was too good not to share...

"Sacrifice crosses a line into martyrdom when it's not balanced with self-care. Our kids don't need a martyr; they need a mother. A martyr gives up her life to the extent that she no longer exists – she loses who she is while taking care of everyone else. A mother cares for her family and cares for herself. She allows motherhood to expand her experiences and her understanding of herself. A mother models the art of self-care for her children when she pays attention to her need for rest, nutrition, and exercise. She shows them how to find a Friend who understands when she takes the time to pray and read God's Word. She strengthens their faith when they see her turn to God for answers to her own life. Following the example of Christ we can learn to sacrifice without losing ourselves along the way." ~ from Real Moms, Real Jesus by Jill Savage

Since becoming a mother, I'm constantly re-learning the art of self care and how to die to pride.  Why is it so hard for me to ask for help?  I've realized that - news flash - I cannot do it all.  Gone are the days when I managed employees, juggled 20 intricate spreadsheets at once, and did multitudes of data entry at record speed as if I had a third hand.

Nope, can't do it all anymore.  And many days, I just need help.  I just need a small break.

So, now, I take friends up on their offers to watch my daughter for the morning while I go enjoy a hot cup of tea and sit on the floor at Barnes and Noble, flipping through a book in the nature section.  Sometimes getting a few hours to myself is the best choice I can make - for myself, my husband, and my daughter.  Still, I admit it's hard for me to accept sometimes.

But I'm proud to be taking better care of myself lately.  Here are a few examples...

• Getting regular alone time, however short.
• Every morning when I wake up, I spritz some lavender oil onto a very hot washcloth and hold it over my eyes and face.  Ahhhhh.  It feels amazing, and I immediately feel awakened and a little pampered.
• Painting my toe nails a fun color.  It makes a difference! 
• Going to bed earlier.
• Waking up before my child, so I can have time to read the Bible and drink tea by myself.
• Making a green smoothie almost every day.  I feel like a million bucks after drinking it.
• Getting out for walks at least once a day.  Essential.

How do you take care of yourself?  I'd love to know!

Time to simplify!

When your sister-in-law texts you all the way from Iraq, you listen.  I'm so glad I took her suggestion that day to download the book Organized Simplicity when it was free on Kindle. 

The author, Tsh Oxenreider, is also known for her blog, Simple Mom.  Now before all the non-moms peace out on this blog post, please know that you don't have to be a mom to benefit from this book!  It includes tremendously useful advice on how to simplify and organize your life, no matter who you are.

One of the things I love most is her definition of simple living - "living holistically with your life's purpose."  That's it.  Simple living doesn't always mean starting a compost pile and living on solar energy and trading in your gas-guzzler for an electric car.  That might be "simple living" for some people, but it's different for everyone.  There is a do-able and realistic way for ALL of us to live more simply.  Because of that desire, I started this blog over 6 years ago.

I'm still working on totally defining our family's purpose, our mission statement - but I know it will definitely include the word "peace."  Peace in our home, peace in relationships, eliminating anything that doesn't bring peace to us and others.

Once I have our mission statement fleshed out, I fully intend to declare by creating some wood pallet art for our wall - like this or this.

Anyway, as I continue to work through this book, I'm excited to join the author and tons of other people on Project: Simplify!  For the month of March, there's a focus each week on how to simplify, organize, and declutter an area of your home. 

When I get rid of physical clutter in my home, I actually feel a lightness in my soul.  Each time I get rid of more stuff, I'm moved from a place of entitlement to a place of gratefulness.  A few months ago, our close friends who love organizing came over, and in a whirlwind few hours they helped me declutter practically every room in the house.  Ahhhhh.  The kitchen was suddenly way more functional, the closets had lots more room, and I had a huge pile of things to sell or donate.   Now, I'm ready to do it again, as there is always more to give away.

But more importantly, I'm trying to stop accumulating more unneeded stuff.   Amen?

Do you want to join the decluttering challenge?  Just click this image below for all the info.

And let's see how our lives are changed, our relationships enhanced when get rid of some STUFF!

Loving Our Kids On Purpose.

It just makes so much sense...

"God is a safe place.  Because sin has been dealt with in the New Covenant, we no longer need to be punished or controlled but need to learn to manage our freedom responsibly, which changes the goal of government as well as the goal of parenting.  When love and freedom replace punishment and fear as the motivating forces in the relationship between parent and child, the quality of life improves dramatically for all involved. They feel safe with each other, and the anxiety that created distance in the relationships is chased away by a sense of love, honor, and value for one another." ~ Loving Our Kids on Purpose, p. 43

The premise of this book - Loving Our Kids On Purpose by Danny Silk - is building a heart connection with our children and teaching them to manage the freedom they've been given, modeling the way God interacts with us, His children.  When God sent Jesus, something new was created, something much greater than rules or The Law - a relationship. 

No, it's not about letting my 18-month-old do whatever she wants, without any boundaries.  If that were the case, then today alone, she would have jumped off the bed onto her head, drawn with crayons on the blinds, and eaten dog food.  It's that I love her enough to stop and teach her in that moment, rather than screaming "STOP DOING THAT!" while I continue surfing Facebook. 

My challenge is to redirect and show her how to use her energy without falling on her head, how to be artistic without defacing the blinds {although sometimes the mess just happens, and you deal with it!}.  It's about respecting her as the unique, divinely created individual that she is.

One of the greatest bits of parental advice I've received so far is on this simple plaque from Etsy.  I must repeat it to myself several times daily as I alternate between pulling my hair out and being thankful - "Luci Belle is not an inconvenience.  She is a human being, for God's sake.  When she's tugging on my leg saying 'Mama!  Mama!  Pease!', stop doing the dishes.  Stop, kneel, and LOOK at her." 

It's not easy, and no parent is perfect.  The other morning, I cursed out loud multiple times and smacked our naughty dog in front of my daughter, and even though she had no clue what I was saying, she saw what I was doing.  Ugh.  I acted rashly and violently.  I immediately burst into tears, so not proud of myself at that moment. 

Loving well and loving on purpose isn't the easy way.  The easy way is to react, to inflict punishment out of anger, to say, "Just do it because I said so."  What's difficult is getting into the nitty gritty of real relationship and loving intentionally.  I want to establish trust with my children, to walk through life with them.   And above all else, to love them well.

God help me.

-ing.

Here's a random collection of inspiring things I wanted to share...

Reading {books}:

Orange Jumpsuit by Tara Leigh Cobble.  I highly encourage you to read Tara-Leigh's three wonderful memoirs.

Loving Our Kids On Purpose by Danny Silk.  God wants our hearts first, then our obedience.  It is out of a love relationship that a desire to obey follows.  The premise of this book is building a heart connection with our kids, first and foremost.  Love it.

One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  Reading this for the second time through and discussing it with a friend.  Will write more about this soon...

Loving the Little Years: Motherhood in the Trenches by Rachel Jankovic.  Great, dry humor, and a quick read.

Reading {online}:

The 5 Best Toys of All Time.  YES.  My daughter has more fun playing with paper and plastic recycling than anything in her toy bin!

Blessed Are The Entitled?  Interesting post on how Christians seem to feel entitled at Christmastime, which isn't a very Christ-like quality.

Santa, Strategically.  A pretty balanced view of how to keep the real meaning of Christmas the focus without totally giving up the fun tradition of Santa Claus.

Watching:

Why, Christmas movies, of course!  See my list of Christmas movie essentials.

Cooking/eating:

Homemade coconut milk ice cream.  A new staple in our house!  Mix together in a blender: 1 can coconut milk (not the lite version), 1/2 cup maple syrup, 1 tsp vanilla, 2 egg yolks, dash of cinnamon, dash of sea salt.  Add some cacao nibs or chocolate chips if you'd like.  Process through an ice cream maker, and voila!  Dairy-free, sugar-free amazing ice cream in about 20 minutes.  Your gut will thank you.  We often double the batch and then store the extra in the freezer in a tupperware.

Roasted winter veggies.  It's practically an every-night essential these last few months with so much squash in season.  Here's how: Cut up some butternut squash, onions, potatoes, sweet potatoes, and perhaps some Brussels sprouts.  Or even get crazy and add some beets.  Keep them in large bite-sized chunks.  Put in a bowl and toss with melted coconut oil, salt, and pepper.  Spread in single layer on a baking sheet and roast for 30-45 minutes at 425 degrees until tender and caramelized.  As far as a cold-weather side dish goes, it doesn't get much better than this!

Discovering:

How To Be An Unschooling Family.  This post is from one of my very favorite blogs, Walk Slowly, Live Wildly.  When I read this post about unschooling in their adorable cottage in Colorado, my heart quickened within me.  THIS is what I want to do with our family.

Back to the Land, Reluctantly.  This article is a unique, entertaining perspective on the whole "urban homesteading" phenomenon, because this woman did not do it to be trendy, she did it out of necessity.  "It quickly became obvious that anyone with a rectangle of sunny ground outside can grow stuff; you just need to think about what grows up and what grows sideways so that you can get it all in there properly."

Mothers In Crisis: Ethiopia.  So many organizations are doing incredible work with orphans around the world.  But how about helping mothers before they get to the point of having to put their children up for adoption?  Mothers In Crisis' goal is keeping families together...love it.

Afghanistan: Touch Down In Flight.  An absolutely stunning video of imagery of the people of Afghanistan.

Seeing:

The incredible fall we've had in Dallas.  I haven't seen one this stunning since I moved here in 2004.  Every day there is a new golden tree to admire...

Listening:

My friend Jeremy Cowart used to be my source for all things cool in the music world when I lived in Nashville.  But since I no longer live near my dear Cowarts, let's just say my music selection leaves much to be desired.  Until someone gives me some good suggestions, I'm still listening to Gavin DeGraw like it was the year 2005.  Help?

A prayer for today.

Morning, today.

"Lord, help me now to unclutter my life, to organize myself in the direction of simplicity.  Lord, teach me to listen to my heart; teach me to welcome change, instead of fearing it.  Lord, I give you these stirrings inside me.  I give you my discontent.  I give you my restlessness.  I give you my doubt.  I give you my despair.  I give you all the longings I hold inside.  Help me to listen to these signs of change, of growth; help me to listen seriously and follow where they lead through the breathtaking empty space of an open door."

~ from Common Prayer: A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals

Sunday's harvest.

"Food, a French man told me once, is the first wealth.  Grow it right, and you feel insanely rich, no matter what you own."
~ Kristin Kimball, The Dirty Life

This is what we harvested from our garden yesterday...

Loads of herbs: mint, green and purple basil, oregano, sage.

Fistfuls of red onions.

One red cherry tomato and tiny golden heirloom pear tomatoes.

Sweet potato vine that we sprouted by sticking a sweet potato in the ground and watering it.

Wildflowers: cosmos and a poppy with 2 petals.

And this is just the beginning...there are enough tomatoes in our backyard to feed our entire street, all green and firm on the vines that have taken over the entire back quarter of our yard.  But that's okay, because while we're just scratching the surface of the harvest our little backyard can provide, I'm reading The Dirty Life by Kristin Kimball and am absolutely head-over-heels in love with this memoir about a city girl who marries a farmer and adopts "the dirty life" on a farm in upstate New York.  It's enthralling writing.  Steven and I keep fighting over who gets possession of the Kindle for the evening.  Then we go back and forth reading and looking up and saying to each other, "This book is so us!" 

Perhaps there is a real farm in our future...

Random tip: Did you know you can brush your teeth with a sage leaf?  Seriously.  Just rub the leaf all over your teeth and you'll see the grimy residue on the leaf and your teeth will be squeaky clean!  Just a little tip for you from my people, the Italians!

What's on my Kindle?

This is by far my favorite Kindle screensaver. Shocker.

My Kindle was a generous birthday gift from Steven's parents.  Before I had one, I never thought I'd appreciate a digital book reader.  After all, I have pledged to read the printed word, and nothing can replace the smell, the feel, the comfort of a well-loved book's pages in my hands.  However, as a nursing mom, I have to admit that holding the skinny Kindle in one hand and cradling my baby in the other has proven quite handy!  It's easy to navigate the pages with one finger.  There are tons of free books you can download.  And I've been able to read so many more books this way.

So, what's on my Kindle right now?  In true Christine style, my Kindle books are organized in neat little categories.

faith
The Mission of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson - currently reading
One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp - read
Stepping Heavenward by Elizabeth Prentiss - read
Becoming a Woman of Freedom by Cynthia Heald 

novels
Hannah Coulter: A Novel by Wendell Berry - read
Crossing Oceans by Gina Holmes - read
The Journey Home by Michael Baron
The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest by Stieg Larsson
The Apothecary's Daughter by Julie Klassen
The Little Known by Janice Daugharty
Roseflower Creek by Jackie Lee Miles
The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas

biography & memoir
The Secret Holocaust Diaries by Nonna Bannister
Letters of a Woman Homesteader by Elinore Pruitt Stewart
Unbillable Hours: A True Story by Ian Graham
The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin by Benjamin Franklin

poetry
These are only samples.  After trying them, I think I'd like these books in actual bound form so I can underline and make notes...
Why I Wake Early by Mary Oliver
Evidence: Poems by Mary Oliver
New and Selected Poems: Volume One by Mary Oliver

children
The No-Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley - read

I'd love to know what you're reading...printed or digitally!